Social networking essay


Above is the first edited version of my essay, by using the draft as a guide I was able to improve upon the feedback notes. Furthermore using the feedback I got from the draft, I was able to make the necessary adjustments to make the essay better. So the improvements I have made is; adding some more book references using the Sherlock webpage.

Furthermore I have been able to develop some of the points I made in the draft, as  by looking at the feedback notes I realised some of the points have not been explained properly and that some of the points are in need of changing as they do not make sense or are in need of refining.


This version of the essay is a developed more refined essay with the feed forward sheet and front sheet to have those additional necessary features. Reading through the essay I have made some improvements to make a essay that has correct punctuation and grammar. Plus I have some additional points with book references to help provide some valid references that back up my points.


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